Why I Apparently Need to Update the Netflix Queue Sometime This Century

Back when we first signed up for Netflix, I got very excited about it. I checked the queue constantly and added a ton of movies to it. At first, we watched the movies all the time and moved through the queue pretty quickly. But then we began to lose interest. The movies sat around longer and longer. You know how it is: you’re in the mood for something lightweight, and Netflix sends you a documentary about the Holocaust. And it’s your fault, because you put the damn documentary on there 6 months ago when you were feeling bad about always watching such stupid movies all the time and trying to be more intellectual. Now it’s gotten to the point that I don’t even remember the movies I added.

The other day, Lord Kissington held up a red Netflix envelope and said, “Are you ever going to watch this?”
“What is it?”
“[Insert name of pretentious-sounding movie]”
“Hmmh, I’ve never heard of it. Did you put it on the list?”
“No, you did.”
"Are you sure about that? Seriously, I’ve never heard of it.”

He read the description to me. It involved sensitive young people growing up in a war-torn environment or something like that. It didn’t ring any bells.

“Are you sure you didn’t put this on the list? It doesn’t sound like something I would pick. I mean, it’s not a teen comedy or something starring a hot British guy.” I asked.
“No, it’s definitely one of yours.”
“Maybe I had some sort of blackout last year and added a bunch of movies I can’t remember?” (Let’s be honest here—the pre-wedding stress could have easily put me into a fugue state in which I updated the queue yet have no memory of it.)

This is not the first time this has happened. So, I finally decided to update the queue. Again, many of the titles were unrecognizable to me, despite the fact that Lord Kissington claims they were all my choices. A couple of them appeared to be a remnant of my short-lived but intense fascination with Sam Rockwell (fall 2005). The rest are a mystery. I was able to clear out the queue, which is awesome because now the next two films to arrive are much more to my liking: Bring It On and The Princess Diaries. I definitely remember adding those ones.