DC Confidential
Back in the day, Ann Landers used to occasionally put a “confidential” message at the end of her column. I assume that these were messages to people who didn’t want their letters published. The messages were usually cryptic and read something like:
Confidential to
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
I’ve decided to take a stab at my own version of this feature. These messages are directed to people who haven’t asked for my advice, but who are sorely in need of it. Also, my messages will be far less cryptic than Ann’s.
Confidential to woman walking in front of me on
If you must wear white after Labor Day (and I’m really begging you not to), for the love of God, please buy a thong in an appropriate color. Hint: white or beige would work. Hot pink or black is a no no. Maybe you want to show off your thong, but trust me, this is just not appropriate in the workplace.
Confidential to the angry blonde on the elevator in my building this morning:
Banging hard on the “Lobby” button six times in a row isn’t going to make the elevator move any faster. In fact, if the elevator is anything like me, it will probably go even slower, just to spite you.
6 Comments:
At 10/13/06, 2:51 PM, Brunch Bird said…
Hi-larious!
At 10/13/06, 7:27 PM, Anonymous said…
You totally can wear white after labor day. "Winter white" is classy as long as you don't spill on it.
At 10/13/06, 7:44 PM, Lady Tiara said…
brunch bird: thanks.
anon: "winter white" implies wool or a heavier, more seasonally appropriate fabric, which is a very different thing than a see-through white cotton summer skirt worn in october.
At 10/14/06, 2:42 PM, JordanBaker said…
I saw a girl at the Georgetown Loewes last weekend wearing a coral cashmere twinset I bought at J. Crew a few years back with a tres thin white cotton skirt I bought at Mexx this summer. I love both pieces, but it would never have occurred to me to wear them together, or to wear either of them last weekend (too late for white, too warm for cashmere).
At 10/14/06, 11:59 PM, Frankly, Scarlett said…
to all metro escalator riders: DO NOT just stop at the end of the stairs for others to trip over you! keep moving!
At 10/17/06, 11:05 PM, Lady Tiara said…
jb: i can only assume that DC's confusing weather has made her so crazy that she didn't realize the inappropriatess of that combination.
ir: absolutely. what is it with people who do this?
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